Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Can you believe this? They aren’t even married yet and already a film is being (has been) made about their relationship, from their meting at St. Andrews to their becoming a couple. Has there ever been such a band wagon to jump on? Actors Camilla Luddington and Nico Evers-Swindell portray the pair in the upcoming film “William and Kate” – an original title, no? Already premiered in the states and due to be seen in the UK on Channel 5. Do you think the actors were cast because of their names? It’s obviously going to be a film for the hooray Henrys, the maudlin blue rinses, dyed in the wool royalists, little girls dreaming, and a no no for anyone of any intelligence judging by the clip I have just watched and what the actors have to say about it. According to Nico, take note of this if you please, these are brave words, people are going to “have a jolly good time watching it.” Bravo, Nico.
We have in our village a zaxaroplasteio (we sell sugary things) in other words a cake shop and confectioners and, boy, do the Greeks love their sweet cakes that come in an infinite variety. The shop’s motto emblazoned on the side of their van reads in English, “Beyond Fresh.” Hmn… Yes… well I don’t think it says exactly what the proprietors mean it to say but we do get the intention. As far as the celeb culture is concerned and, let’s face it, William and Kate have become celebs of the very first order, (I’m surprised some enterprising publisher hasn’t offered them a trillion dollars to write their very own book. Guess that one’s still in the pipeline) the motto should read ‘Beyond Ridiculous.’ Am I the only old sourpuss who thinks so? In a way I can’t help feeling sorry for them and there’s Harry’s wedding yet to come. It must now be like living in a goldfish bowl or doing intimate things in public with a million pairs of prurient eyes gleefully watching.
Jesus and the Virgin Mary are constantly being seen in cloud, sand, and rock formations etcetera but a short while ago, I don’t remember if I ever mentioned this, the Prophet was discovered in a tomato! And now, not from the sublime to the ridiculous but from the ridiculous to the even more ridiculous; Kate Middleton’s features have been revealed on…Ta-ra-ta-ra…a jelly bean! Of all things, a jelly bean! “Trainee accountant Wesley Hosle spotted her image as he opened the jar with his girl-friend Jessica White. (Jessica is a jar opener?) Her long hair, strong facial features and even her smile are clearly visible in the yellow jelly bean’s red blotches!” As the wedding is only two weeks away Wesley hopes to make a few pounds by selling the bean to a collector. He’s not a trainee accountant for nothing.
Meanwhile on the other side of the Atlantic, the American illustrator Tom Tierney has created a nine inch Kate doll in her underwear with seven changes of costume and there is also a William with a couple of changes of his own.
It gets worse: phone company T-mobile hired a host of royal look-alikes to make a commercial in a London church. It is so unbelievably tacky I don’t now why I even mentioned it and how on earth did they even get permission to do it?


Kjohn said...

I saw that on the news. Who would even think to look for her image on something like that? a Nutter.

Anonymous said...

Sir: Where is your sense of humor?
I loved that spoof of the wedding. I laughed. Laughter is good.